Thursday, October 29, 2009

The First Part of Chapter 14: Halloween and After

Eunice was hosting a Halloween party for herself and all of her friends who did not have the blessing of children; she had invited almost everyone she could think of, and was planning for quite a packed night, which it was: her friends, husband’s friends, and neighbours showed up. Eunice was dressed as Frankenstein’s wife, but Mario did not complete the costume, as he disliked face paint. Therefore, he dressed as batman.

“Isn’t a mask more uncomfortable than face paint?” She asked, in reaction to what he had chosen.

“But face paint feels icky,” he said.

“Very well, I’ll just hope that someone else comes as Frankenstein.”

She noted the appearances of the guests, as they arrived: Christine was a female vampire; Belinda had borrowed Eunice’s slutty witch costume that she had decided against wearing, Peter, the comedian, came in a mask, disguised as the Prime Minister, while her friend Rana from Kingston was in a goblin costume. She was disappointed that Clarissa had not shown up yet; it was 8:30, and she couldn’t possibly be at work as she had seen her on the bus on the way home; she had even seen her open the door, so she could only be home. She gave her the benefit of the doubt and assumed she would show up fashionably late, although that wasn’t her style. She also occupied herself with Clarissa––indeed, who wasn’t thinking of her, who was still in mourning over the loss of her husband.

Peter was introducing himself to Mario: “Hi, my name’s Pete,”

“You mean Peter Charles Ku, the comedian? The one who satirises politicians?”

Peter, amazed at having been recognised beneath a mask, was quick on his feet. “No, not that one,” Mario looked disappointed.

“Actually, I do satirise politicians. Have you heard there might be an imminent election call? The opposition is all geared up for a Christmas campaign,”

“Really? Well, I wouldn’t know; I don’t follow politics.”

“The opposition say Meach has spent too long in power. He’s grown corrupt, and has forgotten his principles.”

“Is that them saying that or you?”

“Well, both; either way, it provides fodder for me. Have you heard the one about him, the French President, and the walrus? Well, the French president is very fat, he has a big moustache, and everybody calls him ‘walrus’ behind his back, but nobody does so to his face. Meach and his Foreign Minister, Alain-Bertrand Glengarry, both made the same mistake of referring to him that way. The look on the poor guy’s face was priceless! Then he went on the news kvetching about it to anybody who would listen. None of them took him seriously, and he moped all around Europe.

“Then there’s what the Bloc leader, Valence, said about seal hunters. Unfortunately, it wasn’t seal hunting season, which is April, and then it got picked up by all the networks, and not everybody understands French; and you know what the French word for ‘seal’ is, right?

“Let’s not forget Question Period; it’s brilliant; half of my material comes from Question
Period,”

“There was that good one on Friday that I can remember,”

“Ah, yes: ‘Don’t you have any new ideas?’

“‘Don’t you?’ It reminds me of Agnes MacPhail, not that I was alive then, of course,”

Mario laughed; he had remembered watching the CBC piece on CNN misinterpreting “seal” in French, leaving many Americans thinking he was cursing his constituents. At that moment, Rana noticed Peter, and said, “Are you Peter Charles Ku?”

“Who?”

“Don’t kid around; I recognise you from your show on CTV.”

“Fine, whatever,” and then Peter turned to talk to Rana, who was still agog at seeing a
comedian at a friend’s house.

“Really, I’m not that well known; my show comes on at midnight,” he protested.

Mario, not wishing to bother Peter––he was a polite host––turned to another of his guests, Christine: “Nice vampire costume, it’s very seductive.”

“Thanks, my boyfriend and I have a Dracula theme going on. I’m supposed to be Dracula’s wife. Oh, Vlad!” she called her boyfriend, whose actual name was Zachary. He came over, and greeted Mario; they knew each other through Eunice, and Zachary was friendly with Mario from their dinners together.

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